Oleh: Bahagia
Dalam hadis riwayat Imam Muslim, ada seseorang wanita yang datang kepada Aisyah. Lalu, Aisyah memberikan tiga buah kurma. Wanita itu kemudian memberikannya kepada setiap anak satu buah kurma dan satu kurma tinggal di tangannya.
Dua anak kecil sudah memakan dua buah kurma itu dan memandang pada ibunya. Si ibu lalu membelah yang satu kurma itu menjadi dua dan memberikan kepada kedua anak itu masing-masing separuh. Setelah Nabi Muhammad datang, Aisyah mengabarkan tentang kejadian itu.
Beliau lalu berkata, “Apa yang membuatmu takjub dengan kejadian itu, sungguh Allah telah memberi rahmat-Nya kepada si ibu itu atas kasih sayangnya kepada kedua anak kecil itu.” (HR Imam Muslim).
Dalam kisah lain, seorang Arab Badui pernah bertanya kepada Nabi, ’’Apakah Anda mencium anak laki-laki? Kami tidak pernah mencium anak laki-laki.” Nabi SAW bersabda, ’’Aku tak dapat berbuat apa-apa terhadap kamu jika Allah mencabut kasih sayang dari hatimu.” (HR Imam Al-Bukhari).
Aqra bin Habis pernah melihat Nabi sedang menciumi Al-Hasan. Aqra berkata, “Sesungguhnya, aku mempunyai sepuluh orang anak, tetapi aku belum pernah mencium seorangpun di antara mereka!”
Lalu Rasulullah SAW bersabda,’’Barang siapa tidak menyayangi, dia tidak akan disayangi.” (HR Imam Muslim). Kasih sayang Rasulullah SAW kepada anak kecil selain senang menciumi mereka maka beliau juga seneng memangku anak-anak kecil.
Usamah bin Zaid mengungkapkan, Rasulullah SAW pernah mendudukkan seorang anak di atas salah satu pahanya dan mendudukkan al-Hasan di atas pahanya yang lain. Lalu, Rasul memeluk mereka berdua lalu berdoa, “Ya Allah! Sayangilah kedua anak ini, karena saya menyayangi keduanya.’’
Makna hadis di atas paling tidak ada empat perilaku model dalam memberikan kasih sayang yang diajarkan dalam Islam kepada anak-anak yang masih kecil. Pertama, memberikan makanan ringan yang dia sukai seperti permen.
Membagi makanan-makanan itu dengan adil kepada anak-anak jika lebih dari satu dan jangan ada yang lebih banyak dibandingkan dengan yang lain sebab akan menimbulkan iri hati kepada yang lain. Kedua, memberikan ciuman sebagai bentuk kasih sayang.
Ketiga, memangku anak-anak dan dan keempat meletakkan mereka di atas pundak. Cara-cara di atas merupakan gambaran bagaimana memperlakukan anak-anak supaya tumbuh dengan baik dalam hal kecerdasan yakni kecerdasan emosional dan spiritual.
Kasih sayang terhadap anak akan memengaruhi perilaku dan karakternya. Tentu hasilnya akan berbeda jika yang muncul adalah kekerasan terhadap anak.
Sumber: republika.co.idIn Islam, Muslim children are considered as precious gifts from Allah Subhanahu wa Ta’ala. They are loved immensely by their parents and they become the fondness of the family. But children should also be aware of the many rights and responsibilities of their parents. There are many verses in the Holy Qur’an which acknowledge the debt that an individual owes to his or her parents. One responsibility of a parent is to make sure the child gets educated. Parents have to make sure the child is happy, honest, and religious and has knowledge about Islam irrespective of the fact that they might be boys or girls.
When we teach children, we should remember that a child often learns from examples. The examples of parents play a very important role in bringing up a child. Parents who want their child to be religious, honest and disciplined should themselves be religious, honest and disciplined. The Noble Prophet Muhammad (Sallallahu alayhi wa Sallam) has said “Be careful of your duty to Allah and be fair and just to the children”. Parents should also be fair to their children so that they can be fair with others around them. A father should not bestow more favors on some children than others without a valid reason since this kind of treatment will produce jealousy and hatred among siblings. The Noble Prophet Muhammad (Sallallahu alayhi wa Sallam) has said “Do justice among your sons” and he repeated it twice. Allah Subhanahu wa Ta’ala has promised us that He will not change a person’s condition until the person changes himself or herself. Parents should be respectful and not say lies if they want their child to be respectful and truthful because a child does what he sees.
When a child is born, it is the responsibility of the parents to give him or her a good name. It is also Sunnah to slaughter an animal when a baby is born and to feed friends and the poor as a sign of thankfulness to Allah Ta’ala for the blessing, which is bestowed on them. The parents are also responsible for circumcising a male child at any time, which is convenient. Parents should provide a pleasant environment for their children so that they feel that they are secure and loved.
One huge responsibility of a parent is to teach the child good manners. The Prophet Muhammad (Sallallahu alayhi wa Sallam) has stated “No father can give his child anything better than good manners” (Tirmidhi). A Muslim parent is responsible to teach their children how to greet people, how to eat, how to sit, how to drink and so on. The Prophet Muhammad (Sallallahu alayhi wa Sallam) has also said, “Those who do not show respect to others, respect will not be shown to him”. They should be taught that they should treat people the same way that they would like to be treated and that they should have good manners and good habits because Allah Subhanahu wa Ta’ala dislikes people with bad manners and bad habits. The Prophet Muhammad (Sallallahu alayhi wa Sallam) has said, “Among the virtues and habits they should develop are the habits of being honest, and truthful, gentle and polite, helpful and considerate without being loutish in their behavior to others and the habit of being clean, neat and tidy when looking after their personal hygiene and appearance”. They should be taught how to be clean so that they could look after themselves when they’re older.
Parents should send their children to a Modern Madrasa (with an integrated curricula) to give the child guidance to be a good Muslim. They should make sure the child knows how to read the Qur’an well and has good knowledge of Islam. A child should develop a thirst for knowledge through listening, observing, reading and interacting with others. Children should be taught how to read the holy Qur’an and Hadith at an early age so that they develop the love for it when they’re older. They should be taught good morals, good characters, good Islamic knowledge and proper Islamic behavior.
Parents should give a Muslim child a proper understanding of man’s relationship with God. A child should be taught that man is dependent on Allah the Almighty and that Allah Subhanahu wa Ta’ala is the Most High and he does not have any mother, father or son. He should be taught of the existence of angels and Shaitaan. A child should be able to understand the purpose of life, the reality of death, the returning of every human being to Allah and the future life in Paradise or Hell. By the age of five or six, a child should learn to love Allah and thank Him. Slowly, he should learn the guidance that Allah Ta’ala gives to human beings through His Messengers, peace be upon them. They should be taught of the guidance, which was conveyed, by the Noble Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam and the love and respect, which every Muslim should have for him. Therefore, a strong Islamic base is established in the child at a very young age that will further enable him to watch over his actions and to further acquire more knowledge about Islam. As a result, a Muslim child understands that the guidelines set by his parents for him are not only the wishes of his parents but are also the wishes of Allah the Almighty.
Allah has not only given parents responsibilities but He has given them rights as well. He has given them the right of disciplining or punishing their children when they do something wrong. Parents have the right to punish them.
Courtesy: http://www.irfi.org
